Dear alex,

I would like to say… a few things about you that is… a just little bit to true for me… It wasn’t clear to me, intill I felt the pain which I put you through…. I write this as a friend that knows now… the pain you be feeling… You should always know, you will be in my heart for eternity… I’ll look to these stars tonight, and feel your pain… I didn’t know when I saw… You… I’d crack a smile and choose… you to make me smile… to offer my shoulder to… Lift that beautiful smile up to the world and let it shine… When you need someone to dance your life with, I’ll be the first with my hand up… Little heart breaking boys… back off… I aint going to let you break this ladies heart…. I hear you be crying now, and I offer my crib as a setback, and my napkin to wipe your face… Look at me, I will make you smile… I just wanted to let you know… this and that…. Ill always be there… to pick up from that hard ground, what ever you need…. Ill be there….. Alex I choose you as my friend, and I wont let nothing come between that…. When ever you feel like your down… I will be there for you…. As long as u let me be….

Your friend,

Macallan

the deep sea inspired by a friend just met

I sat by your side.... and will till the end of time.... when you are crying... i will offer my shoulder..... when you fall down... i will offer my hand down and pull you back to your feet.... we shall run side by side till the end of time... when you are feeling down... i shall be there to turn the frown... into that lovely smile..... i will look into those eyes... and say i love you countless times.... I will run up and down those mountain sides... just for you.... you are the opposite side.... to this heart of mine.... this just might be a poem... but i mean it to the worlds end... to the worlds deepest sea i will dive down... and fetch that broken key... that is to your heart... you dont need to work for mine.... for you stop my heart every time i hear your voice... every time i see you, i faint..... when i think about you... i feel like i can fly to jupiter and back.... I sit by your side.... and shall till end of time... pondering when you will be mine.... not that other mans... who keep breaking your priceless heart.... and i keep picking you back up and setting you on your feet... hoping you will look into my eyes... and see... that i love you... and shall be by you till the end of time... stop falling my blind love....

believe me when i say im there...

Keep it by me till the end of time…

To the end of the earth and this mind of mine…

I know you be scared to open your heart to mine….

For every guy has been a ass to you….

But what you don’t see….

Is the difference as a friend between me…

And them…

Is that I will offer my shoes so you can run your own path…

I will walk next to you, or just wait for you at the end of the path….

I will offer my umbrella when it is raining tears…

A shoulder to cry apon…

I hope you’ll see that I care…

And you will know it be not a seeming thing in the air…

I havnt yet left a friend of mine…. It be them turning their backs on me…

To lead that path of their own….

I know you be wanting to just look at me

And know, that someone will be there to catch you

I hold my arms up till I know you know I be there to catch you…

I know and so do you….

That in the end I will be there to catch you when your scared…..

I wont let go, till u tell me to….

Ill set you down on this beautiful earth we be calling ours….

You can run far away….

But in the end when you turn around and need that one being…

I will be standing there, with these arms open… and mind pondering

Why didn’t she just believe me?

dont you be trippin

She trips over her feet thinking about you…. She don’t know why she has fallen so hard for you… I be her friend, it hurts me to see, that you caused her such pain and joy for thee…. You where more then just love for her…. It cant be true no more… when I saw you two, I thought you two where meant to be! It’s the story of her life… sorrow, tear driven eyes of hers…. She dont know why she be tripping for you…. She don’t want this to be no more… but when ever she walks out of that door, she thinks about you… she says she is over you now, but I know… that she be faithful to you even after you shut the door…. I wish as a close friend of that angel friend of mine, that you just open that door up one more… and let it be, I know from the way you look at her… that deep down you do love her, you knew it was meant to be… as a friend ill pry that door open once more… just so you two know once more it was meant to be… It kills me inside to know… that she be alone in this forsaken world… and to know you just be on the other side…. Don’t hurt her no more…. I can feel it like a pulse of electricity… it flies through this air…. Because I know she loves you so, I will fall from the worlds end to get you to the other end together… everytime, she just dies a little more when away from thee…. <3>

hope for the hopeless

mhmmm..... listen to this little thing i gota just write.... i thinking.... about this day we had.... we can start again.... just another day... take the time... and form those memories... that can make a baby cry and a married person smile..... bring it back to the start line.... so long... as i keep trying to make the wrong right..... bring it back.... i know you will stand by me... just i need to dive to the bottom to pick up this heart of mine... gona need you to be patient.... it will require what no girls asked of me...i will try to stay strong.... but u gota realize.... i aint that strong inside.... a little hole just makes me slide deeper....i realize, that you be the same.... and i hope from the bottom of the ocean that it wont be me, to make that hole...lets bring it back...just meet again at that start line that marks the start of eternity...start to make those remembering moments...make no holes within our shield.... no moles to makes us fall.... a frown turned upside down and into that little smile...

LIFE>sucks

I am so tired with this life of mine… I just wana reach out for a hand to help me out of this fucking dump…. Maybe I just done with trying… maybe I want to turn my eyes away… jump from this track of mine… Follow the pack of minds… Not fight through this slump of mine…. I imagine it be like in a dark endless hole… not being able to see forward or back… maybe I should just end this singlized path of mine…. I just starting to get this position im in… Coming to grips with this reality of mine… Finally realizing it be playing this heart of mine… this mind of mine… Just getting fucked when I think I reached it… Ever get in a fight, it be like I the loser and always getting shoved back to the ground… Head down…. Not wanting to look up for fear of eye contact…. I be so Fucking tired of this hell of mine… People look at me… they see a happy ridden boy of 15… not the joy empty shell of mine…. I know other peoples pain because through it all I see my fucking own… Done being me, done with this life… I kept trying to reach out… but the only hand I found was my own…. Im done trying to be someone else… done being myself…. It be time to change the guy I be… should I be like other guys… a dumbass mother fucker…. Or should I be a sweet heart…. Fag or lover…. Hater or a actor… everything is such a intense kind of gloomy… but I know what its to be… I’ll pick myself back up… and continue with the F*** life of mine… and jump up on that trial of mine and continue on with how I be….

Lying awake is just as sad as dreaming

I lie awake just dreaming about you… the hands behind my head lonely, my eyes searching the ceiling wishing that you where here… I watch the sunset, but it isn’t the same with out you there to hold me hand… I will turn over in bed… but that don’t help… for it reminds me… that’s what you did to me…. I watch the ocean crash against the shore… but that just makes me sad, for it reminds me how i asked you out on that same beach… I like awake just thinking about you… Wishing those hands, which I held, to catch this tear… It takes two to whisper I love you.. but only one have it crash around your ears…. I wished I don’t feel so alone… as many times I say I don’t feel alone… I know… that really I just be thinking of you… I lay in bed drifting to sleep dreaming about you… hoping that I could just move on but I really know I will never forget that darling who held my empty hand… I am asleep now just dreaming about you and in that dream where back together like its meant to be…. Good morning little angel